Doing activities with a spouse

I was going to write just about being married, but this holds true even for people who aren't married.  I'm aiming at people who have been together for a while.  The new car . . . errr . . . relationship smell has worn off and you're wondering where to go from here.

Being in a long lasting relationship takes work . . . I know.  You got married, or just agreed to live together.  The hard part is done, right? . . . nope.  Relationships that are successful are the ones where the partners work at it . . . that's right:  work.

Successful relationships take WORK.  It doesn't magically take care of itself.  There's all sorts of things like talking to each other and spending time with each other and stuff.

So now you're in a long term relationship.  The sparklies have all rubbed off and you have seen each other in the bathroom.  So what do you do together?

Well . . . dinner and a movie are traditional, but those can get old after awhile.  You can go bowling or miniature golfing.  These are excellent things to do.  The question becomes how to mix it up.

Another idea taking long walks on the beach with the moonlight shining on the water (works best if there's a beach nearby)  Do that once a week, take a blanket and a bottle of wine with some cheese and crackers if you like. (remember the corkscrew . . . punching it in with a screwdriver works in a pinch . . . not that I would know) 

One of the best things you can do is take some sort of classes together.  Your parks and rec department usually offers a variety.  My wife and I took ballroom classes, which was really fun.

I'd like to note that what works for one couple doesn't always work for another.  There were others in the class who argued all the time.  If you're going to do an activity that makes the relationship worse, it's not working.  You can't just go through the steps while secretly resenting the activity, you have to give it an honest attempt.

Other classes are martial arts or self defense classes (warning: letting your wife learn how to beat you up in public is a bad idea . . . just sayin)  Gardening, cooking or yoga are excellent choices too.

Another idea is to join a choir together (providing you don't sound like a cat in heat when singing . . . ask someone who doesn't love you how you sound).  My wife and I joined a community theatre and did a play together.

The idea is to spend time together.  Try something that neither of you have ever done before.  Learn a new thing together and have a few laughs.  Don't take yourselves too seriously if it's not that easy or if you make mistakes.  The idea is to have fun together.

Life is difficult.  It may be hazardous to your health.  Sharing it with someone can make it a bit more tolerable and even fun now and then.  Even with someone else, the stress can wear a person down.  It's okay. 

The relationship takes some work.  Spend some time doing something new and fun together.  Hopefully you'll find something you both enjoy together.  Even if it doesn't go to well, you should be able to chuckle about it later in life.

I wish you the best and hope your relationship has many fond memories for years to come. :)